Ma siLat b0y is back.. back in ma life..
Monday, March 07, 2005
Yazid called me last nite.. yeah, Yazid, my long lost bestfren back to th0se pj years.. G0d..i miz him s0 much. Has been thinking b0ut him like many times. The last time we talked was when the day we takin A level result. That time, he called me and said that he'll miss me a lot. I asked him y? Then he said, he's n0t takin the result wif me, c0z he d0nt want me t0 feel sad f0r him.. I tried 2 change his mind but he's s0 persistent 0n takin his result al0ne. I juz let him be wif his decision. I d0nn0 that tat day was the last day we saw each 0ther.... I th0t i l0st him c0z he changed his n0.. Even his buddy Hasyim din kn0w his new n0.. what kind0f fren is that rite??..
When last nite he called. I was s0 happy that i can feel tears in my eyes... Its great to hear his v0ice again. Th0ugh theres t0ns 0f awkward m0ments during the c0nversati0n, juz the sound of his breaths on the ph0ne, makes me feel tat he's here wif me.. I juz wanna cry... haha. As always.. I kn0w i haf a l0t 0f cl0se frens. But wif yaz, its different. He c0nnects t0 me em0ti0nally.. N he saw me thr0 many things back then..
Some part 0f the C0nversati0n:
Yaz : Sh0f, u kn0w i miz u rite?
Me : yeah.. i think.. but u left me. U left syim n me, rite?
Yaz : That time, i tink its best to leave b0f 0f u. My life was hectic back then. I nd time to settle
things d0wn. I kn0w it s0unds selfish.
Me : I d0nn0, im so pissed wif u.. H0w cn u f0rget us?
Yaz : N0. I dint. I still remeber tat day.
Me : What day? ....... (thinkin2)........ oh.. u mean tat day i cried.
Yaz : U cried many times b4, gurl..
Me : haha ( 0h.ok .. paiseh2).. u mean that last day 0f sch00l?
Yaz : yeah.. Im s0rree i made u cry.
Me : Its n0t juz u. Its everyting that's happenin in my life tat time.
Yaz : Oh k.. S0 h0w's sch00l? Many 0f my frens kn0w u.. U muz be fam0us ar?
Me : haha.. really? which 0ne ur fren? (start kembanging)
Yaz : u kn0w u cn be fam0us f0r the wr0ng reas0ns rite?
Me : har? (kembang bubble burst)
Yaz : haha.. juz j0king. but my frens d0 kn0w u.. Any really cl0se fren d0wn there?
Me : Cl0se fren like guyfren i like isit?
Yaz : Cl0se fren like u n me... n syim.
Me : (figuring 0ut what he meant).... n0.. we are close in big group. But n0thing close like us.
Yaz : oh k..
Me : giggle (d0nn0 4 wat.. felt stupid f0r a while)
Yaz : U still s0und like the little girl i kn0w.. haha
Me : hey.. im a lady okie..
Yaz : U r alwys small girl 2 me..
Me : smilezzzzzzzzz....
Haha.. Im glad that some thing is back on track.. yeah, the Right track.. B4 i went t0 sleep, i thought bout th0se times i spent wif him, back in 0ld pj days. H0w we quarrelled bout small stuff. H0w i made him miserable f0r making him ch00se btwn spending time wif me or wif Ifa, h0w he made me smilez by saying beautiful things..There's one time during PJ days, wen we din spent recess time 2geda. I d0nt even b0thered t0 l00k up f0r him. Aft sch00l, we met up as usual ard 3. He told me to haf lunch 1st b4 g0ing hm. I said I've eaten 0redi. He said if I'm sure or n0t, c0z he saw me drank mil0 0nli. I was sh0cked. I said I dint see him. He smile n said," I always see u. Its u that hu din see me."
Thinkin back again, i realized i muz haf taken him f0r granted then.. H0w stupid n selfish i am. H0w could i? after all we went thro? Hes seen the beautiful n ugly part 0f me. haha.. I still remember that he said i looked ugly when i cried.. blehzz, whatever...
L00kin back at what ive written ab0ve, i w0nder if we are in love wif each 0ther.. i d0nn0 bout his part. But i kn0w i love him n i d0nt nd a relati0nship t0 make me feel l0ved n cared n feel special.. F0r n0w, i tink.. for n0w...
